My husband and I recently got HBO Max and I’ve been LOVING being able to watch Doctor Who again. Hopefully this time I can actually get all caught up to the present episodes as life got in the way while I was watching Twelve. And while I almost skipped to Ten right away, I am part of the #NeverSkipNine crowd and had to start at the beginning of New Who. And I’m so glad I did. It really is fantastic and you just can’t skip past The Empty Child 2-part episodes. That’s where I really fell for the Doctor.
Now I’m currently just past the Doctor Donna with the Doctor traveling alone once again, in the middle of “Water on Mars.” The lonely Doctor. And it still amazes me just how deeply this show has grabbed onto my soul. And how much I absolutely admire David Tennant as well. In all the shows I’ve watched, all the movies I’ve seen, there has never been anything in entertainment I’ve felt so strongly towards than Doctor Who and especially Mr. Tennant. It really borders on idolatry, or perhaps surpasses it quite honestly, which is so weird for me. It’s a tv show. A fictional character. It’s a person I’ve never met. Why do I feel such a strong connection?
Perhaps it’s all the things about Mr. Tennant that I mentioned in my previous post. His humbleness, his generosity, his urge to make people smile and laugh. It just comes through so clearly in some of his roles but especially as the Doctor or when he’s himself. And I also believe there’s a way to tell people apart who are enjoying life and extend that joy to others. People who just want to make the world better often have the same physical characteristic:
Laugh lines.
You know those creases at the outside of the eyes? Not the wrinkles caused by age, but the ones caused by smiling and laughing a lot. The deeper they are, the more jubilant the person. Watch him as the Doctor. Watch his eyes when he smiles. (And what huge smiles he has!) Those lines are deep; and that was 15 years ago. He positively glows whenever he’s smiling, whether he’s acting or being himself. (The Scottish accent helps too, if I’m being honest.)
As I said, I’m currently watching the Tenth Doctor and my obsession (gods I hate using that word but it’s appropriate) has still not gone away. It doesn’t take over my life, of course. I can still function, I’m still head over heels in love with my husband, still take care of my children. I don’t have posters up anywhere obsessing over a fictional character or actor. I’m still a realist and recognize this is irrational. I don’t let it take over my life. And it’s not any sort of weird romantic-like obsession. I just admire this man so much and if I tried to explain why, it would be long-winded mush of words jumbled together and still no solid, coherent reason. Except for maybe this one thing.
He just comes off as an absolute GOOD and WHOLESOME person.
That’s it I suppose. The core of it. He’s the type of person I want to surround myself with. Someone I would love to become friends with. It’s probably even deeper than that as I could also name other actors I would love to become friends with too because they also seem like great people to know. (I say “seem” specifically because, again, I don’t know them personally.) I guess if you believe in auras, you could say his shines brightest to me. It speaks to me more than anyone else’s (that I don’t know). And I just really wish I could put my finger on why he’s more special to me than any other celebrity.
I’ve never been this level of obsessed before. Typically I’ll follow an actor for a while, watching a bunch of stuff they’ve been in and interviews and such (though I try not to get into personal life stories that they haven’t told themselves), then it’ll fall to the wayside and it’s just another actor that I like. But this has been at least a few years now and I’m still just as awestruck now as I was at the beginning.
So tell me, my very few and far between viewers, what now? This type of feeling is never talked about. We hear about psycho fans, the passing fans, the psycho fans who have a creepy romantic feeling towards celebrities, and the quiet fans who enjoy works of their favorite celebrities but are content to watch their work as it comes. But what about people like me? I’m not psychotic about my admiration. It’s not a romantic/sexual thing. And while busy and among friends/family I’m perfectly normal. But it’s those quiet times, times by myself, when I get that urge to look at anything and everything he’s ever been in. To listen to his voice, see him acting, or even just being himself. Once I start looking at and listening to him, I get sucked in. (It’s taken me far longer to find pics/gifs/video for this post than it should have.) Is there a psychology for something like this? Between the creepy obsessive and the passive fan? I’m not the only one caught in this limbo that’s never spoken about am I? Is this normal? Is it normal to want to get to know someone so badly that it actually kinda physically hurts sometimes?
Am I alone in this void?
The Variety of David Tennant (and friends) 